Donnie Baker for President (Shutup, Randy!)

Have you ever tried to order anything off of Amazon.com? I just purchased a couple of books for myself and Hubby. The site was very easy to navigate....until you go to pay for it. Why is it important what I had for breakfast? Why do I have to keep verifying my email address? WHY IS MY EMAIL ADDRESS IMPORTANT? I could put 'gravyinpants@aol.com' .....why does it matter? Are the amazon police going to come in the middle of the night? I know, they send you a verification of your purchase. I KNOW. I just dont know why they ask for it 85935829508 times, and then one time you'll type it wrong, then it comes back and you have to re-type all your info again...............Can you tell I'm frustrated? Bite me, amazonians!

No, my book isn't on anger management. That would be funny, though....to call a bookstore all pissy wanting to know what books they have on managing anger.

I really need to get on an exercise regimen. I have no excuse, really, other than lack of motivation. We have a workout room at work that we can use free of charge, which is nice, but after working a 10 hour shift, the last thing I want to do is go upstairs and walk on the treadmill. But I must! I just hope I don't see any doctors with their shirts off. Well, unless they're hot.

I'm also afraid I'll forget where I'm at and be singing along with my MP3 player.
Walking on the treadmill, eyes closed, "HOOOT childdd in the cittyyyy!!!".....then I open my eyes and see the housekeeper looking at me. Most of them know me anyway...I always move their carts down the hall while they're cleaning the bathrooms.

I was watching 'Ellen' yesterday, and she had the "Hip Hop Abs" dude on there. It looks really fun, but for someone like me with NO coordination, aerobics is not something I eagerly sign up for. I'm the girl when the whole class is moving R, I'm going L. Don't even get me started on those damn steps. Step up with your R foot, hop, step down on your left, dance a jig...anything with more than 2 things to do is OUT. I'm better off walking laps around the gym while this part is going on. I look like I should have a helmet and pads on because I am so uncoordinated.

And why is it when you're doing ab crunches your body all of a sudden gets gassy?

One place I really like to go and walk is down by the river. Me and my friend Daphne used to walk down there alot. The stairs where you watch fireworks is EXCELLENT for your calves. Something that was fun, but not smart, was running down the hill towards the river. She'd be in front of me and I'd be screaming, "I can't stop! I can't stop!" If she all of a sudden stopped, or tripped, I'd be in deep crap. Running down the hill towards fast moving water is not the brightest idea. Your momentum gets going and it scares the crap out of you because you don't think you'll ever stop. We need to put hay or a wall of tires down there if we decide to do that again. Or I need to start running with my floaties.

I really need to get a grip on my hormones. Either that, or start weeding out the stupid people. You'd be amazed the amount of people who call for patient room numbers, and don't know the patients last name. That's kind of vital, Einstein.

Caller: "I need a room number."

Me: "Allright. Shoot."

Caller: "Chad."

Me: "Chaaaad?"

Caller: "I don't know his last name."

Me: *Click*

This one kills me....

Caller: "I need my Dad's room number."

Me: "Ok."

Caller: *silence*

Me: "What is his name?!!"

Idiot.

I think I am going to stop reading the news online. I rarely catch it on the tube, so that's not a concern. I never realized that once I had children how much I would be affected by ALL kids.

It hurts my heart when I read abuse stories or worse. Sometimes I wonder why it's even news to begin with. I feel the media crosses the line way too much. With Britney Spears for example. It is obvious this girl needs help. As a parent, you can only do so much, but instead of calling "trusted" magazines to print updates on your daughter, why not get her help? I'm not there, I have no clue what's going on, and frankly, it's her business, I don't care. I feel bad for her little ones, though. Lord knows what they have been witness to. Having kids is not easy. I'm still on a roller coaster of hormones from having Shelby in September.

I had a lady bring her daughter in today and as I asked for her proof of insurance, she goes into this spiel in front of her daughter about how her daughter was adopted by her ex-husband, and she's fighting with his attorney because the ex-husband has taken this little girl off of his insurance but kept his "real kids." I wanted to cry! I'm thinking, "SHUTUP!" Kids remember more than what you think they do. I found out not too long ago that an ex of mine (who had adopted children of his own) has bailed out on one of his kids. It's a long, ridiculous, hard to believe story, but it's true. If I saw him today, I'd definitely make sure he could never have kids of his own. Children aren't disposable! They're little helpless adorable sponges that look to you for everything. EVERYTHING. Being a mom is the best gift ever, but I never realized how awesomely hard it was to be a parent. It's so much more than changing diapers and feeding and watching "The Little Mermaid" 800 times like you did when you babysat your neighbors kids. Seriously, I can quote that movie I watched it so much. Courtney (who I watched until she was about 2) is 21 now. God, I'm old.

More later - I've typed so much about kids I'm missing mine.

xoxo

Mel