Great Expectations: Not all I expected it to be

Oh my lord, I'm dying. Elizabeth! I'm comin!! I just took a drink of water and I guess it went down the wrong way, but since the baby is asleep I tried to contain the ensuing madness, and ended up having crystal light come out my nose. I hate that burning that follows...you know, the same burning that when you go swimming you ALWAYS get water up your nose. So there you are trying to be casual looking like you just got hit in the face with a dodgeball..."I gob wabber in my node!"

I just sneezed about 600 times. You go, body defense system!!

My brain: "Warning! Warning! Crystal light...what the...? In the NOSE?? Really?!"

Oh my gosh. This really sucks right now.

Something that struck me funny....I read an article last night where a man's GPS system told him to turn R...so he did.....INTO THE PATH OF AN ONCOMING TRAIN! What a moron! Of course the car got stuck, he got out in the nick of time, but COME ON! Update your software, Dork! If mine told me to turn R and it just happened to be the end of a cliff, I might think twice....I wouldn't think, "Maybe there's candy at the bottom!" and go for it. Idiot.

I'm still sneezing.

I haven't left my house since I got home from work Tuesday night. This is not good for someone like me, with too much time on their hands. Tonight is the usual...go out for Mexican then grocery shopping. I grocery shop the same way, every time. It's like I have a map of Wal-Mart in my head, and I do my list from that, which I usually leave at home or at work. *Image of Missy finding a post-it with Corn Dogs, Diapers, Vaseline....."Whose list is this???"*

We were talking at work the other day about it...frozen foods are always last! And do you use those "keep cold" bags they provide? I never knew about those until we saw some dude (probably gay) putting his whatevers in one. I was like, "Awesome!!" (Doesn't take much to excite me.)

Oh my god, this is awful. If your heart stops every time you sneeze, I should be dead right now. I look like Sylvester Stallone in the final scene of Rocky.

I guess I shall close considering I can now feel my heartbeat in my nose from sneezing 487 times. This was so not what I had intended on yacking about....I guess when I remember what it was, you shall read about it.

Party on Garth,

Mel *ah-choo!*